When...(as an aside)

When you put your 3-year-old down for a nap and when you go upstairs to check on him and when he's not in his bed and when you know he's not downstairs because he can't open the safety gate and when you check under his bed and when you check in your bed and when you check in the closets, out the window, in the bathtub, in the toilet, when you wake up his sister from her nap and probably the neighbors from screaming his name, before you call the police, check the dirty clothes hamper. You know, the upright one with the lid on it. He might be in there. Asleep.